three little ducklings
I went over to the our pool to swim laps in the afternoon yesterday. When I was getting coffee, one of the older ladies whom I see there frequently looked over at me and asked, "You're the triplet mom, aren't you? I don't really mean to call you that, but you are, aren't you?"
"Yes," I responded, and I think of all the attention we attract at the pool. When we cross the pool deck together, my girls follow along behind me in single file, wearing cute, colorful bikinis and bouncing, braided pigtails. It's hard not to notice us.
"Well, I just want to tell you what a delight your girls are and what a great job I think you and your husband are doing in bringing them up."
It's the kind of statement that warms my heart, but also makes me wonder...does she know who my husband is or is she actually watching P., our "manny," with our girls and mistaking him for the father.
When the girls were younger, I couldn't go anywhere with them by myself--one adult is just not enough to take care of three 2 year olds at a playground. At that age, they would run in three different directions and would need help climbing on the smallest of slides. P. and I went everywhere together during that stage, and everyone always assumed that the two of us were the parents, I guess because a male childcare provider is so unusual and because there was no obvious difference in age, etc.
It made for some funny moments...like the time I realized the misunderstanding with another mom we had just met at the park and stuttered my way through various iterations of "oh, he's not the father...I mean, he's not my husband...um..." until finally P. interjected to the relief of our wide-eyed newfound friend, "I'm the help."
Now that P. is able to take the girls to swimming camp at the pool by himself, most people that don't know our family assume he is the father at first. So, when this woman is complimenting us I wonder if it's really P. that deserves the credit. That's the insecurity of every mom who has a nanny (or in this case a manny) talking. Of course, I know that's not completely true, and my husband does help out a lot more than most. I guess what it boils down to in the end is that this endeavor has really been a team effort.
"Yes," I responded, and I think of all the attention we attract at the pool. When we cross the pool deck together, my girls follow along behind me in single file, wearing cute, colorful bikinis and bouncing, braided pigtails. It's hard not to notice us.
"Well, I just want to tell you what a delight your girls are and what a great job I think you and your husband are doing in bringing them up."
It's the kind of statement that warms my heart, but also makes me wonder...does she know who my husband is or is she actually watching P., our "manny," with our girls and mistaking him for the father.
When the girls were younger, I couldn't go anywhere with them by myself--one adult is just not enough to take care of three 2 year olds at a playground. At that age, they would run in three different directions and would need help climbing on the smallest of slides. P. and I went everywhere together during that stage, and everyone always assumed that the two of us were the parents, I guess because a male childcare provider is so unusual and because there was no obvious difference in age, etc.
It made for some funny moments...like the time I realized the misunderstanding with another mom we had just met at the park and stuttered my way through various iterations of "oh, he's not the father...I mean, he's not my husband...um..." until finally P. interjected to the relief of our wide-eyed newfound friend, "I'm the help."
Now that P. is able to take the girls to swimming camp at the pool by himself, most people that don't know our family assume he is the father at first. So, when this woman is complimenting us I wonder if it's really P. that deserves the credit. That's the insecurity of every mom who has a nanny (or in this case a manny) talking. Of course, I know that's not completely true, and my husband does help out a lot more than most. I guess what it boils down to in the end is that this endeavor has really been a team effort.
posted by kim at 7:17 AM
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